worst travel blogger in the world

Alright, so in the two and a half months that I've been traveling I have blogged twice. WOMP! I know, I know. In my defense internet was really slow most places and/or I just didn't feel like sitting on the computer for an hour while I had a country to explore. So to my loyal reader(s), I sincerely apologize and I will make it up to you with a big picture update....when I get home. :)

Since my last blog update Hera and I have been through Laos, Cambodia, and now, Vietnam. Hera actually left yesterday and before she left, at our last dinner, we kind of did a big recap of the whole trip. I asked her what she thought she learned, what part was her favorite, what part was the hardest, and it just trickled into us recollecting all the major things that happened on this wonderful trip. As we were doing that, I kind of got overwhelmed. It's hard for me to think about how this was our lives for two months. We packed and unpacked our backpacks countless times, we laid our heads on a different bed almost every other night, we crossed paths with so many incredible and not so incredible people and to top it off, I don't know how many times we have said, "eh let's just go with it or we'll cross that bridge when we get there".
I can't complain one bit about my life back at home but I'm already back to making appointments here and there or thinking about two weeks from now. When traveling, it's day to day. It's that moment that's real, not what's happening weeks from now. Thinking about what's happening weeks from now really meant nothing to us this summer.
So as you can tell, I'm in process mode. I'm trying to process all the things that I went through and what I've learned, because I've learned a hell of a lot.

I'm actually finding myself staring at this computer screen because there is so much running through my head. I can't wait to share with you guys the things I've learned but I think I need a little more time. So in the meanwhile, I'll leave you with a story from Laos.

Buddhism is the primary religion in Laos. And actually, many Buddhists from surrounding countries often make journeys to Laos because they are said to be one of the only places that still hold on to the original Buddhist traditions. a.k.a they keep it old school. Well Hera and I were in this beautiful city called Luang Prabang in Northern Laos. This city is known for the Buddhist temples and monasteries. They are also known for the hundreds of monks that come out in the morning to collect alms. Alms are something that regular folks like you and me give to a monk in order to be blessed and to continue their monastic continuity (shoutout to wiki for that one) Alms are done everywhere but due to the fact that there is a particularly large number of monks in Luang Prabang, the Alms are a sight to see. It's like seeing a sea of orange walking along the street. The people sit on the sidewalk with pans of sticky rice or some other food/gift to give and the monks walk by with what look like bronze vases slung across their shoulder and you just drop your alm in.
Although it required a 6:00 AM wakeup, I was excited to see this beautiful tradition in action. I told Hera the night before that I definitely did not want to participate in this but just wanted to observe. I even read up on it online the night prior and the article talked about how some Buddhists want this tradition to no longer continue because it's becoming more of a tourist attraction and losing it's authenticity. So in my mind, I was set. There was no way I was going to participate. I had no desire to- The last thing I wanted to do was to taint this beautiful tradition.
So Hera and I walk out our guesthouse, bleary eyed and sleepy, and this lady runs up to us and she tell us to go sit down where the locals are giving alms. Hera and I said in our robotic, slow english, "no, no, no, we're going to just watch". She kept insisting and we kept saying no. We tried to walk away but when we said no, she looked like she was getting upset so I thought maybe we were disrespecting her and her religion. She ended up dragging us to where the Alms were being given and made us kneel down. She handed each of us plate after plate of these packaged cookies to put in the monks alm basket. As soon as she was out of plates and while monks are passing us by she whispers, "you pay money now".
WE STRAIGHT UP GOT PLAYED!
Ugh... So Hera and I were upset to say the least and we paid the stinkin' lady. We paid her less than what she asked for but it was more than we wanted to give.
So there was lesson #29342789349 out of 129837192412094010248... Just say no and quit getting so emotionally attached to people you don't know. Hera and I had a hard time saying no and this story proves it.

To tell you the truth, we got played quite a few times. We have many a ridiculous story to tell and I can't wait to tell them. But for now, I must go.
See ya later Southeast Asia, you've been damn good to me.

elephantastic!

So I'm sitting at a laundramat in Chiang Mai, Thailand doing my laundry for the first time since I've started my travels. Tomorrow we head out on an epic three day journey to get to Laos. It's going to take approximately three buses and two boats for us to cross the border and make to Luang Prabang, Laos. Should be interesting!!

Hera and I are just wrapping up a two week trot through pretty much all of Thailand. We started way down south in Phuket and then took a 14 hour bus ride to Bangkok. Then after one night in Bangkok we took a 17 hour sleeper train to the beautiful northern city of Chiang Mai. It feels like we have done so much. We went snorkeling, laid out by the beach, laid out by a pool, went to a national park, took a cooking class, explored each city we were in by foot, went to a lady boy gogo bar, took a tuk tuk that drove on the other side of the rode (meaning opposite of traffic), and ate the best street food in the world. We have done incredible things and it still feels like our journey is just beginning but what I want to tell you about is what, in my mind, is probably the most amazing thing you could do in Thailand... Visit the Elephant Nature Park here in Chiang Mai.

Hera and I just spent the last two days feeding, walking around with, bathing, and learning more about elephants. This experience is still rocking my world and I really did not want to leave.
As many of you may know, here in Thailand the elephant is worshipped and pretty much put on every and anything that represents Thailand. People here have elephants like they have pet dogs. Literally though, elephants are put under the same category as livestock (ie, cattle). Any harm done to an elephant has minimal consequences. Many elephants are used for shows, riding/trekking through the jungle, begging in the streets, and formally used for logging. Little do most know is that a majority of these elephants are treated so terribly. In order to train these elephants they go through an excrutiating process called "crushing" which is an appropriate name because they literally crush the spirit of the elephant in order to have it listen to its owners.
Okay, I know, blah blah blah right? I could talk about this forever and I'd love to do it in person but I'll cut to the chase.
There is this Elephant Sanctuary that was started up by one woman. She takes on all and every kind of handicapped elephants. We got to play with ones that have broken backs, legs that were blown by land mines while logging, blind, mentally unstable, and really, everything across the board. They were all this way due to mistreatment by their owners in the past.. This place is seriously incredible. It is full of wonderful people and it is a place that is truly filled with compasssion.

I kind of have to cut this short because my time is running out on the computer and my laundry is almost done. But after leaving that sanctuary my heart feels a little more full and I hope that I could return again to spend a little more of an extended period there.
Moral of the story is that you should think twice before mounting an elephant or paying money to the owner to see it do silly tricks.

ahh.. i am so in love with elephants!

I will leave you with some pictures. The first two is actually from Malaysia but the rest is Thailand.

pad see ewe later, crystal

Malazin' Around...

Okay not really. Malaysia was kind of everything BUT lazin' around.
But first I must apologize because this post is going to lack pictures and it's kind of late seeing that I'm half done with Thailand now. But honestly, you think I really want to sit around in front of a computer while I'm in a beautiful new country? (actually, I don't mind it because the internet places are always air conditioned.. and man is it HOT here)

So Malaysia!! It was finally time to meet up with Hera to start our adventures. Our first bridge that we had to cross was meeting each other in the airport. I was arriving about 9 hours before her and we had no form of communication besides a "okay... I'll see you at the airport.. I hope"
I arrived at the Kuala Lumpur International Airport at around 9:30 PM and so I had to pretty much lurk around the airport until 7:30 AM when Hera arrives. I went in an out of sleep on an airport bench and finally it was time for Hera's flight to arrive. I stood at the arrival area where all the friends and families reunite happily. While anxiously waiting at the front of the crowd, I was picturing Hera and my reunification. I imagined myself seeing her first and yelling "HERA!" while waving and smiling. There would be squeeling and hugging and just an utter relief between the both of us that we found each other with no problems...
So I wait and wait and pace back and forth because I see no sign of Hera. It's probably already been two hours since her plane has arrived. At this point I'm kind of starting to get a litttttlleee nervous. Something doesn't really seem right so I awkwardly ask some airport person.. "Is this where AirAsia arrives?" and of course she says no and tells me that there is a WHOLE DIFFERENT airport that is 20 minutes away. And as soon as I started cursing to myself I hear a, "CRYSTAL!" heehhehahaahaaaaa! Hera found me!

Haha anyway, Malaysia was fast. We only gave ourselves five days in Malaysia which only reassured the fact that you should never book stuff in advance, just in case you want a few more days in a place that you fall in love with. We hit a different city every night that we were there and it felt like it was go, go, go. Our last night was on this amazing island called Palau Tioman.. I totally got my burn on. :)

Right now we are passing through Bangkok to get to Chiang Mai. We are meeting tons of travelers that are putting Hera and my two months to shame- it's amazing! We are both healthy and well (for the most part) and I am truly getting my fill of curries, Pad Thai, PadSeeEwe and TomKha... I think I could bleed coconut milk now. But that's for my next blog about Thailand. I will try to put up pictures.

Pad See Ewe Later!

Korea's got Seoul!

Holy smokes! Today I leave for Malaysia to meet up with Hera and start our adventures together. In all honesty, I'm ready to leave Korea. I'm sad to leave but only because I'm leaving my family here. I don't see them often, maybe once a year and it has been so good to spend time with them.

But like I said, I'm ready to move on to the next place. Korea has been so comfortable. I know exactly where I'm going to lay my head at the end of the day and I know what faces I will see when I go downstairs in the morning. Hey, I'm not knocking on comfort because who doesn't like it? But I yearned for this long awaited journey for reasons opposite of comfort.

I know many of you think I'm crazy but there really is nothing like traveling in a foreign country and feeling so present. Feeling like every decision is made on how your heart is feeling in that very moment. Even if it comes down to picking a place to eat or which rickshaw to get in to... it is all in a matter of a few moments that you make those decisions.

I totally went off on a tangent-back to Korea.

So this was my first time being in Korea without my mom. Well that's a lie, I came in 5th grade for three months during the summer and lived with my grandma. She fed me so much that I had to be rolled around by umpalumpas everywhere like Violet in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. But again, I digress. So this was the first time I have been to Korea minus mom and old enough to wander alone. My biggest fear in coming was that I would stick close to my family and not explore the way that I actually wanted to explore. I would like to proudly announce to you all that I hit my Chacos to this Seoul pavement and did my fair share of exploring!

The very metropolitan city of Seoul is oddly nestled in between a handful of mountains so I got to do quite a few day hikes around here which was nice (and also scary especially when I stumbled upon the oldest Shamanist Shrine in Korea and ended up in a place where they used to do exorcisms) But I think one experience that I am still trying to process today is when I went to the North and South Korean border also known as the Demilitarized Zone (DMZ) or the 38th parallel.

I don't know what I expected or why I had this need to see it but I felt this pull to go.

When I watch documentaries about North Korea, I always get this heart wrenching feeling in my body as I'm sure most of you with a soul do. Watching a documentary is just a tip of the ice berg and knowing that makes me even more sad. After watching these documentaries, the number one thing that runs through my head is, "This is happening right now." And I do the usual, "I live this beautiful, lavish life and these people have NO IDEA what it is to truly live" And another huge part of me says, "They're KOREAN."

I think the reason why I wanted to go to the DMZ so much is because I wanted to feel these things but not just feel, but be a part of it in a weird way. I didn't want to just be a fat american sitting on a couch watching an instant Netflix documentary about North Korea. I wanted it to be more real. I wanted more than just the tip of the iceberg.

This is a picture of the DMZ. That building is N. Korea and

the blue buildings are the JSA buildings. You culd see

a N. Korean soldier standing at the top of the stairs.

Well guess what? I went, and I was a fat American sitting on a tour bus visiting a tourist attraction.

I don't know if you could tell, but I'm pretty disappointed in what I experienced there. In order to visit the DMZ and the JSA (Joint Security Area where North and South have meetings and it sits right on the DMZ. Half in N. Half in S.) you have to go on a tour and up until recently, you couldn't have a citizenship in Korea.

So I'll get right to the point (Gotta leave for the airport in an hour) I went there kind of expecting to feel sad or feel scared or feel something... but instead I felt annoyed at the people around me and myself for smiling and taking pictures next to the soldiers. I couldn't get myself to do that. These soldiers stand at the DMZ staring their enemies straight in the eye everyday and my fellow tourists stood a foot away from them with a huge smile and excitement and snapped away. I know I'm being judgey but it makes me sad that this place that is SO full of tension and conflict is just a tourist attraction. I know I should be thankful because without these tours, I wouldn't be there but I.. Oh, I don't know.
As you can tell I'm still trying to process this. My next move-actually go INTO North Korea. haha, not sneak in or anything but they now have tours for non-Korean citizens IN North Korea. I will be putting that on my 101 List for sure.

ANYWAYS! I am thirty minutes away from going to lunch and leaving for Malaysia!!! Stay tuned for another blog!

my heart, crystal

It's that time again (finally)

Oh dear.. this blog originally started as a travel blog because when I looked ahead in my immediate future, I had many a travels ahead of me.. I never expected them to really stop either but alas, the world is a crazy place and they stopped.
I moved to Salt Lake City in September of 2009. I had just graduated and had just come back from the most epic outdoor adventure of my life thus far-ALASKA. I wasn't ready to move back home and I also didn't have any other plans so I found myself moving to Utah alongside some of my dearest friends on this earth. I moved there thinking I would stay for about six months then hopefully move on to perhaps a different country, or just... something other than Utah. Basically, I had no intentions or expectations from Utah. I didn't think I'd make this place my home, find a job that I care about and definitely had no plans on finding love. Well, once again, like I said, this world is a crazy place and Salt Lake proved me to be terribly wrong. I have made this place my home, I found a job that I care about, and I have found love.
You're probably wondering why I am even writing about this.. Well, lately I have been reflecting a lot about Salt Lake and how grateful I am for what I have here. More than that though, I think this reflecting is brought up by the fact that I am feeling the itch to move onward from this place I call home..
Living in Salt Lake has been an adventure in itself but man has it been comfortable. I'm not leaving Salt Lake yet but my eyes are definitely looking towards a different direction than here. I'm hoping to settle down my restless self with a little bit of traveling.
Starting this coming Wednesday, I'll be hopping on a plane to Asia with a pack on my back and a camera around my neck. I'll be spending two weeks in Korea (the muthaaalaaand) with my family then will be meeting Hera down in Malaysia. From there on, all I know is that I need to get to Vietnam by the middle of August. Other than those set plans, my feet are free to roam to wherever my heart desires. Malaysia, Singapore, Thailand, Laos, and Vietnam are the countries I will probably be hitting. I'm going to try to update this blog as much as possible so I could stay connected to you, my reader(s).
I can't believe this is actually happening. Finally, back aboard the traveling train where I get to experience and a part of a different world. I couldn't be happier.

Visitation hours for

1051 Fuller Ave are
Monday-Sunday: 24 hours a day

The months of June/July have been quite the eventful ones.. It all started when I got a phone call from my dad on a Monday night saying, "we're gonna be in Vegas tonight and I was wondering if we could swing over to Salt Lake on Wednesday". I blinked, smiled, and said of course!! My first family visitors!!

step mom, me, and my pops

Then the very next week I get a phone call from my brother, Alex and he says, "Hey! We're passing through Vegas and on our way to Salt Lake! See you in about 7 hours!" It's been a long time since I've received a surprise, and this was an amazing one.

me and my bro

bro and sister in law

Lastly, the next week after Alex and Janet left, I got two wonderful friends from different sides of my life together under one roof! Celeste and Ryan!

The whole point of this blog entry is that although my travels have come to a bit of a halt, it has been incredible to be able to discover a new place outside of California where I've lived all my life. I honestly am not sure how I got here to Salt Lake, nor would I have EVER thought I'd end up here for so long or even at all... but here I am. Still here. Nevertheless, it has been a pretty fantastic experience to be able to share this world that I have been living in for the last 10 months with people I care so much about. (Mom, you're next!) It's just nice to feel a sense of pride about the life I'm living, the house I made a home, and the community I've created here.

Thank you Dad, ahjimmah, Christine, Alex, Janet, Celeste and Ryan for coming to see where I live and where I frolic. It really means the world to me..

So as you can see, summer here in SLC has been treating me well. The mountains have revealed its many hiking trails, there are free outdoor concerts all the time, and it stays light out until 9:30 PM... But I'm not going to lie- I can't wait till the powder hits again.

1051 Fuller Ave. is always open for visitation.

ps.
man its good to work full time hours in just the weekend. you could see why...

Dear Neal #2

Wish I could watch this series with you.
It's just simply not the same.

click.

byebye celts.

slc

bye bye winter...




Hello summer...

my office

"One final paragraph of advice: do not burn yourselves out. Be as I am -- a reluctant enthusiast ... a part-time crusader, a half-hearted fanatic. Save the other half of yourselves and your lives for pleasure and adventure. It is not enough to fight for the land; it is even more important to enjoy it. While you can. While it's still here. So get out there and hunt and fish and mess around with your friends, ramble out yonder and explore the forests, climb the mountains, bag the peaks, run the rivers, breathe deep of that yet sweet and lucid air, sit quietly for a while and contemplate the precious stillness, the lovely, mysterious, and awesome space. Enjoy yourselves, keep your brain in your head and your head firmly attached to the body, the body active and alive, and I promise you this much; I promise you this one sweet victory over our enemies, over those desk-bound men and women with their hearts in a safe deposit box, and their eyes hypnotized by desk calculators. I promise you this; you will outlive the bastards." -Edward Abbey

I'm not knockin' those of you who enjoy working in an office. I'm sure working indoors with artificial cool air blowing above you while your eyeballs burn from staring at the computer too long has its enjoyable moments. And I'm not putting down the fact that freedom comes when it's time for a lunch break or the weekends... haha I guess that was pretty harsh seeing that maybe one day, far from today, I may be doing that same thing. But today, that is the exact opposite of what I am doing and what I want to be doing to pay for my bills.
Although my travel blog has seemed to come to a traveling halt, I'd love to share with you, my faithful readers, my current job. I guess it's more or less a chance for me to brag about how rad my jay-oh-bee is.

Currently I work at a residential treatment center for teenage boys called Crossroads Academy. All of the boys that I work with are between the ages of 14-18 and they have all just come out of wilderness therapy. Crossroads is an after care for these boys. Crossroads is giving them the opportunity to continue therapy while getting their feet back into the world again, sober. They are attending school, whether it's catching up to where they are supposed to be at or even jumping ahead and graduating at early ages of 16! In other words, it's a sober house.
So you're probably wondering what the heck I'm doing there. No, I'm not a therapist nor am I their teacher in school. The thing that makes Crossroads unique is that they have special focus on board sports. Mainly snowboarding, wakeboarding and skateboarding, depending on the season of course. This is where I come in. They "force" the boys to get involved in recreational things such as these board sports in hopes that they are able to find a different kind of "high". So that is where I come in. I do the recreational part! I put in 40 hours a weekend and go with these boys to do these things. We rode and shredded all winter and now we're moving onto a lot of skating and soon wakeboarding. We do other things too like flow riding (indoor wave surfing), paintballing, community service, and hopefully this summer, rafting and camping.
And I know what you're thinking, and yes, this is the most fun job a girl could have...except it does get pretty tough and it has presented many challenges that I never thought I'd have to face. It's not always kicks and giggles at the house (i mean... most of the time it is... but not all the time) My main challenge has been about confrontation and dealing with it. I realized when I first step foot in that house that I am and still kind of am terrible at confrontation. I avoid it and hunker down when it happens. I'm terrible at sticking up for myself when I feel the least bit of weakness. But at this job, in order to not get stepped on by 15 teenage boys and 3 male staff (yes, I'm the only female) I have to puff up my chest a little and be a bit of a, pardon me, a bitch at times. Which is very, very new to me. I'm learning to be assertive and hold boundaries while still creating these amazing connections with these awesome boys! Balance.
This job is perfect for me right now. I am really happy with it and never, ever dread going to work. It is seriously a joy working there.
And although my travels have come to a slight halt, this job keeps me outside, active, and around people and so I can't really complain much. But don't get me wrong. I am itching to get out of the states, bad. So sooner than you know, I'll be jetting off to another place...but I think I'll save that for the next blog because it has been on my mind a lot lately.
Thanks for letting me brag about my job.... Please ask me more about the boys and more about the job. I will talk your ear off I promise!
I'll leave you with a couple videos of my boys doing some pretty cool things:

I hope you readers didn't get too BOARD with this post. heh heh heh heh
I leave you all with a souvenir i took from this epic snowboarding season.

goggle tan............ until next time.. my heart,
crystal

So thankful for video chats&family...

speechless

In all honesty, I have opened up this blog page about ten times and stared blankly at that stupid blinking vertical line that screams "WRITE!"
But no words or thoughts really come to mind. This blog was meant to connect me to those that aren't able to be around me but I apologize for the fact that I can't seem to do that at this time. Right now, my life doesn't seem worth recording. Or maybe it's not about worth, but the fact that I just don't want to outwardly express how I feel... because then, it will be too real. And to tell you the truth, I don't want this to be real-
...even though it's one of the realest things I have encountered.

So instead of being a downer, I'll leave you with a few videos that make me happy-
Sorry Celeste (not really though)
Here is teacher Celeste at her best:






and me and my friends skiing- This was my first time skiing since.... forever.
This video is rated PG-13 for language, brief nudity, and some serious shredding in onesies/wigs


until next time.
my heart,
crystal

is anyone out there?

For those that are... I know I haven't been a consistent blogger, but I'm going to try to change that. I recently received a great birthday gift from my brother and sister-in-law called the "flip".
I'll try to post as many videos as I can...
For starters, here is a sneak peek of what I've been doing a lot of lately:


I've been getting pow shots in the face here and there while breathing in the mountain air as often as possible. It's when I'm up there and riding where I feel those glorious moments where it's just so good to be alive. Ya heard? Well if you haven't, I highly suggest that you hop into your car right now and experience it with me. I would love to share these mountains with you. (along with a nice frosty beer of course)

As for a little update on mi vida... Currently I am juggling four jobs, yes four, and loving each one in a different way. I just recently landed my fourth job which I am pretty sure is one of the best jobs in the world. I basically get to hang out and be a "role model" for 15 high school boys over the weekend at a therapeutic boarding school. Many of these boys have struggled with drugs, alcohol, or other things so they are going through therapy while living at this school. Last week I went paintballing and raced fast go-carts. This weekend we'll snowboard. I think I've found a job where I'm excited to go to work and excited to be at work. There is no staring at the clock here. It's amazing!
On top of that I'm doing research at the University of Utah for the Department of Social Work/Criminal Justice, waitressing, and babysitting the best twin boys there is in Salt Lake City.
It may seem like a lot but trust me, I have selfishly arranged my schedule where I work little and play a lot. I'm still very poor but loving it (except for once a month when bills roll around).

I still constantly question why I'm in Salt Lake and why I'm not doing other things with my life... But I think I would question why I wasn't in Salt Lake if I were elsewhere.
I get to snowboard three times a week and I am surrounded by a supporting and loving community here so it is great. Don't get me wrong. I miss the California sunshine and I miss my family on a daily basis... But I can't have it all. There are good days, great days, bad days and sad days but all in all. I am breathing, alive, and well and I am so thankful for that.
I'm trying to learn balance. trying...
Until next time.



Here's to you Mint. I miss you so much! Hope Japan is treating you well...

Murder on the dance floor...

I just realized that I haven't been able to do a post on Alaska yet.
This is very, very important that I share a bit of this experience with you.
I am always shocked at how much of an impact a place could have on a person.
But this time, it wasn't just the place, but it was the people I was able to share it with.
I was really blessed to have an amazing group of kiddos who I love and miss all the time. A combination of these powerful mountains and these inspiring kids rocked my world. This trip that I led was the reason why I do what I do.
Pictures definitely don't do justice (they never do).
But man, I for sure know that I am one lucky girl to have been able to have this experience.
Anyone wanna go back to AK with me??

Alexa, Eric and I on our journey to the last frontier. gettin' CRUNK!

GREAT SUCCESSSSS WE MADE IT!!! (barely)

Here's my lovely, lovely crew.

Our first section backpacking in the Kesugi Ridge
in Denali State Park. This is where the glory began!

Sea Kayak expedition in the beautiful Prince William Sound

Here we're in Wrangell St. Elias. We backpacked into an island
in between two glaciers (the Root Glacier and Kennicott Glacier)
We set up camp there and ice climbed!

Our last section was a 10 day backpacking section
in the Talkeetnas... (which lead to the rafting)
Burly river crossings and epic views.
Boo-ya

After the 10 days of backpacking we met our raft guides
at a tiny runway at the headwaters of the Talkeetna River...(below)
They were flown in along with all the raft gear..

Big HEART Sun.
I miss you.

http://www.events.org/sponsorship.aspx?id=17651

anything will be appreciated and so so helpful.
thank you thank you thank you.

The Invitation

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living. I want to know what you ache for and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing.
It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive.

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the centre of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life's betrayals or have become shrivelled and closed from fear of further pain.

I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it, or fade it, or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with joy, mine or your own; if you can dance with wildness and let the ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful, be realistic, remember the limitations of being human.

It doesn't interest me if the story you are telling me is true. I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself. If you can bear the accusation of betrayal and not betray your own soul. If you can be faithless and therefore trustworthy.

I want to know if you can see Beauty even when it is not pretty every day. And if you can source your own life from its presence.

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand at the edge of the lake and shout to the silver of the full moon, 'Yes.'

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone and do what needs to be done to feed the children.

It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the centre of the fire with me and not shrink back.

It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you from the inside when all else falls away.

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments.

Into The Wild

So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more damaging to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man's living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun...you must lose your inclination for monotonous security and adopt a helter-skelter style of life that will at first appear to you to be crazy. But once you become accustomed to such a life you will see its full meaning and its incredible beauty. -Chris McCandless

Take time to realize

I'm on your side. 

kiss and ride

So I'm going to work a little backwards because... well because I uploaded the pictures incorrectly and I'm too tired to fix them.

I just got back from an epic time spent in Yosemite National Park with some fantastic people. Heidi, Andrew and I busted up Half-Dome. If you don't know about Half-Dome here are a few facts that I'll brag about.
Half Dome is a 16.4 Mile roundtrip hike. It sits at a nice 8,836 ft with a 4,800 ft. elevation gain... I ate a lot of string cheese! Pictures and a nice video will have to come in August when I get home..if I get home!

The day before I left for Yosemite I was in the East coast due to a beautiful graduation gift from my cousins/aunt. And the day before leaving for the East coast I moved out of Redlands and also graduated! It has been a series of crazy events and I still feel like I'm spinning so please excuse this terrible blog update. I just felt like I needed to post something before I left for Alaska.

The pictures below are not all the pictures I wanted to post but... sigh. excuse excuse blah blah blah..

Okay I'm going to shut it now... I'll be heading to AK in about 10 days but meanwhile I'll be in Northern Cali doing staff training..

Here's my one and only mail drop while in AK so if you so desire to send some love:

NOVA Riverrunners

P.O. Box 1129

Chickaloon, AK 99674

Attn: ARCC “Crystal Lim"

Must arrive by 7/17

prospect park

Welcome to Brookly and Alan!

Ah.. the pretty Brooklyn Bridge. The view was/is amazing. pretty pretty pretty!

Bibian and Me watching a Orioles game. Who woulda thunk I would be in any other stadium other than the Dodger Stadium?

Dunkin Donuts to the Dome!

Me and Mina. I seriously love these museums.

=] A simple sign that made me so happy. This is what they call
the drop off zone for the metro in DC.

We are grown ass peoples.

The love of my life. Mommaaaaaa

My boys. We done it!

Again, I'm so sorry for such a bad post. I'm so exhausted. See you guys in August after AK!! Until then...